Always On Time

In today’s society, social media creates a daunting feeling that we are falling behind. It constantly suggests that you’re never doing enough, that someone else is always ahead, and that even the smallest misstep can throw your entire life off track. I can confidently say that it’s a shock to everyone when graduating high school and seeing where people end up. Some move away, some start families, some go to college, some get married, and some pass away. Yet, there’s always an unspoken standard that makes people question whether they’re on the right path. Is it the fear of not doing enough? Is it the unrealistic expectations set by social media or the pressure from the people around you? Or is it the realization that you didn’t follow through on the dreams you had at 16—when you swore you’d be a millionaire by 20, living in a mansion with fast cars lined up in a 15-car garage?

I'm here to tell you why you feel so behind. It's the fear of wanting to be more—and honestly, you should be proud of that feeling! It means you have ambition, a drive to grow, and a vision for something greater. I'm speaking to myself just as much as I'm speaking to you. It’s me—I’m the one who feels behind. Surprised? Just a girl in her twenties, trying to figure out life, wondering what kind of future I’ll create for myself. The pressure, the uncertainty, the endless comparisons—I feel it too. But maybe feeling behind isn’t a failure; maybe it’s just proof that you're on the path to achieving something bigger.

For some background, I’m a first-generation college student—the first in my family to navigate this path. I had no idea what I was doing. I didn’t know the ACT was one of the most important tests for getting into college and securing scholarships. I didn’t know what I wanted to major in—I changed it five times before finally making a decision. I even took two semester breaks. Needless to say, I was supposed to graduate in Spring 2023, but I walked across the stage in December 2024.

Not graduating on time is something I never let myself forget. As an aspiring law student, I told myself I had to get into law school by Fall 2025—no exceptions. If I didn’t, it felt like all the plans I had carefully mapped out would completely fall apart. The pressure wasn’t just external; it was something I placed on myself, a constant reminder that I had to stay on track—or risk feeling like I had failed.

As I reflect on my time in college, I’ve realized something important—you’re always on time. If I had graduated when I was supposed to, who knows what I might have missed? Maybe I wouldn’t have had the opportunities that shaped me—the chance to work for my school’s sports team running their social media, the friendships I built with incredible people, or the experience of going through primary recruitment and gaining an entire sisterhood. A sisterhood that believed in me enough to elect me as their Vice President. A sisterhood that gave me lifelong friends—friends who will stand beside me on my wedding day.

The timeline I once obsessed over wasn’t delayed; it was just unfolding exactly as it was meant to.

I’ve decided it’s time to stop obsessing over timelines and start focusing on building the steps that will lead to real success, and when I get there, I get there. I’m choosing to fall in love with the process instead of rushing to check off milestones as quickly as possible. Because at the end of the day, establishing the skills you need to make your dreams a reality is more important than the dream itself. Nothing lasts forever—one day, the things that feel so urgent now will be distant memories. But the people you meet, the skills you gain, and the lessons you learn along the way, will stay with you forever.

The truth is, it won’t always be like this. You won’t always be sitting in that class you absolutely hate, debating whether to drop it. You won’t always be refreshing your inbox, hoping someone finally gives you a shot at an interview. But so often, we wish away time, constantly looking ahead instead of appreciating where we are right now. Maybe it's time to change that.

When my friends see this, they’re going to say, "DeShay wrote that!?"—because I’m constantly stressing about never doing enough. It’s easier said than done, I know. But that’s exactly why it’s so important to remind yourself of this. Progress isn’t about racing to the finish line—it’s about learning to trust the journey, even when it doesn’t go as planned.

Telling yourself that you’re behind in life can have serious emotional and psychological effects. It can lead to anxiety, difficulty making decisions, a lack of gratitude, burnout, and lower self-esteem and confidence. And honestly, I don’t know about y’all, but those are not qualities I see in my future when I think about the life I want to live.

Here’s how you can fix that—be kind to yourself. You might be wondering, is it really that simple? And the answer is yes—it’s a great starting point. Everyone is living life for the first time. You’re not supposed to have it all figured out. Stop comparing yourself to others—success isn’t linear. Focus on the small wins, because breaking goals down into smaller, more manageable steps is crucial to reaching them. You can’t get across a lake without a boat, and before you start worrying about the destination, you need to focus on building that boat first.

"Always on Time" is a song my boyfriend and I heard at church one morning, and it stuck with me. In this song by Elevation Worship, there’s a line that says, "Jesus, I was tossed in the water. But I never went under, you were always on time." The more I reflected on that song, the more I understood its true meaning. Your life is already figured out—it’s going to unfold the way you allow it to. But no matter how uncertain or overwhelming things feel, Jesus is always on time. He’s right beside you, even when it feels like you’re failing at life.

So let that bring you peace in your moments of panic. You are going to be successful. You will create the life you want. And it’s all going to work out—not because you’re rushing to meet some imaginary deadline, but because, just like Jesus, you are always on time.